- A couple of weeks ago, someone asked me when I’d be writing another 15 in 5. The person next to them asked, “What’s that?” I realized that it’s been a while since I told y’all. It’s a list of 15 things that should take about five minutes to read.
- A couple of years ago, someone criticized me for writing these lists, saying that lists weren’t real writing, and I was getting off easy. Yeah, so? Maybe I am.
- A couple of minutes ago, I figured out it was time for another 15 in 5 and I silently celebrated. I love lists. Even these pointless, random lists.
- I think I’m pretty much the only American who doesn’t like Krispy Kreme donuts or the hump day camel commercial. Both make me gag.
- I love Halloween, because The Kids love Halloween. Except when they were babies, we’ve pretty much let them choose their costumes. My only rule is that they have to decide before we go to the costume store. The worst potential Halloween task is standing in front of the costume catalog wall at that big party store.
- One year, we let The Boy choose from the wall of crappy costumes. It was just as bad as anticipated. He was a Transformer, which is cute, but the costume broke before we got tricked a single treat. This year, he’s the Grim Reaper. We only had to buy the mask.
- As an aside, if you’re a parent, go ahead and invest in a black cape. The dress-up possibilities are endless, and I promise you’ll use if for at least two Halloween costumes.
- The Girl came to me this year and said she didn’t want to be a kitty this year. For the tens of you who regularly read, you’ll remember her love for the kitty costume. What started as Sparkly Kitty morphed into Cowgirl Sparkly Kitty. I was sad to learn about the possible ending of a very adorable era. Enter Cowgirl Sparkly Witch Kitty.
- I saw that there are now sexy versions of just about anything. One can go dressed as the always in demand sexy slice of pizza or ketchup bottle. Or when it’s sexy, is it catsup? I came across a sexy skunk costume, too. Nothing turns a man on more than a woman who sprays a foul odor from her glands.
- The number one requested Halloween candy is Reese’s cups, followed by Snickers and M&Ms. Some of us like a Laffy Taffy, Blow Pop or Three Musketeers. Let’s not waste our time with much else. Do you want to be the house everyone talks about? Sure you do. Go for the full-sized candy bars.
- I love people watching, but I feel bad for the story I made up about the girl in the parking lot at my grocery store. She was talking to a sheriff’s deputy. I wasn’t the only one who paid attention. He was taking iPhone pictures of her nametag area. I still have no idea what they were doing, but they hugged and kissed goodbye right there in public, so I’m assuming it was no big deal.
- At the risk of ruining a good thing, I’ll tell y’all something. Pizza Joint has $1 slice night. Pints are cheap, too. I’m sure you can figure out what night it is without me telling you. Don’t all go at once, and please save a slice for me.
- If you’re reading this before Saturday, don’t forget to change your clocks this weekend. Fall backward, so we move them back one hour. If you’re reading this after Saturday, I suppose you still need to take care of it.
- How many people still have clocks that need to be changed?
- When it’s light in the morning, it’s much easier to get up. When it’s dark by 5 p.m., I want to go to bed earlier. It’s depressing. We can fix that by starting happy hour earlier. Cheers!
Horrible news Tuesday morning on the Taliban attack in Pakistan that claimed the lives of over 130 young students, targeted by the terrorists if, for no other reason, than they were easy targets. Imagine if you will that the CIA ran across one member of that Taliban attack team last week, and
Hey y’all. Is it Christmas? Do I get to compile my Top 10 Best Christmas Movies to Watch While You Drizzle Bitters on Your Eyeballs yet? Spoiler alert: entries 1-10 are “The Santa Clause 2.” No? Fine. Let’s talk about leglocks. Hard as it is to believe, there are other mixed martial arts
When on a long car trip, a situation will inevitably arise that requires the immediate and accurate knowledge of the closest restroom. Between Augusta and Atlanta, the situation is not terribly bad. The longest stretch between stops occurs between Thomson and the Flying J at Siloam (about 30
Thank goodness for photo evidence, because otherwise most of you wouldn’t believe me. Unless you were there to see it in person, it seems awfully far-fetched. My husband was on stage last weekend. He stood in front of an audience and did stuff. Yep. Over the past several weeks, people have
Over the past 10 years or so, electronics manufacturers have blessed this country with an uncountable number of electronic devices. iPhones, iPads, iPods, Android phones, Android laptops, desktops, Chromebook, MP3 players, MP3 speakers, cameras, smart appliances, smart thermostats, Playstation,
I’ve talked to so many people who are feeling low this Christmas. Most can’t explain why they feel it. I mentioned last week that I needed to get it together for my kids. They won’t be little forever. We have a tree. It’s in the stand and is the most gorgeous tree we’ve ever had. […]
Going into UFC 181 this past Saturday night, there were storylines and high drama galore embedded in the matchmaking. The main event saw a welterweight title rematch between champion Johny Hendricks and Robbie Lawler, a hard-hitting former journeyman on his second, implausible stint with the
My oldest, No. 2, is turning 13 this weekend. This is a moment that I have dreaded my whole life: I will officially be the father of a teenager. I have dreaded this moment for many reasons. The main reason is, as should be expected from me, the most self-centered, narcissistic one: It’s more
Last week we had the first true snowfall of winter (equinoxes be damned, it’s 20 degrees in the sunlight, that’s winter) here in Madison. Depending on the conditions of your particular workplace, it also may have happened completely sight unseen. When I got to work yesterday morning, it was
It’s December, and I need help. The list far exceeds any space allowed here, so we’ll just talk about the December part. If it’s December, Christmas is right around the corner. Weeks away. So here’s the problem. I have zero motivation. I’ve lost my spirit. Never fear. The reason for the season
My youngest son, No. 4, said the most awesome thing to me today: “Daddy, can we go running together soon?” The kid is 6. You don’t hear “Can we go running?” from 6-year-olds. It’s usually “Will you play this-or-that with me?” or “Will you color with me?” or “Can we have ice cream for dinner?”
Undoubtedly, you’ve read all the stories about how Cyber Monday has changed Black Friday. Instead of rushing to the stores on Thursday afternoon or early Friday morning, and without allowing sufficient time to properly digest their Thanksgiving meal, those of the door-busting crowd utilized the
The witnesses continue to pile up as allegations spanning decades destroy the reputation and image of a man once thought to be America’s perfect dad. If you didn’t appreciate Bill Cosby’s humor, whether it was in his stand-up routines or his groundbreaking work as the creator
The first cramp hit my calf around mile 22. I was running, still at a fairly good clip and on pace to finish this damn thing in three and a half hours, i.e. my best case scenario goal time. I read somewhere that it was a good idea for endurance athletes — a term I […]
1. Though I appreciate being thankful, I’m thankful that Facebook people have stopped being thankful every day in November. 2. We should be thankful every day. It’s not a bad practice. Maybe I shouldn’t be such a sourpuss about Facebook. 3. I’m thankful for my new glasses. I thought I just
I’ve decided to add a, perhaps somewhat unexpected, item to my ‘thankful list’ this year. It’s amazing timing that I was presented with the unlikely opportunity to recognize a bodily reaction that most of us take for granted yet is readily available to us when we need it
“If we can’t win in this environment, we have to question the whole premise of the party.” — Democratic operative James Carville on the 2006 November elections “Conservatives who did not beat their liberal opponents in Georgia should consider relocating from their
The past week has been an embarrassment of riches for fight fans like me. Not only did we get to witness a truly legitimate, truly history-making fight in Bernard Hopkins vs. Sergey Kovalev — Kovalev won by a wide unanimous decision — but were also treated to a rare weekend triple-header of
Unquestionably, the fall and winter seasons are my favorite times of the year. The days get shorter. Cool breezes temper outdoor activities. The gentle warmth of a fireplace replaces the scorching heat of the sun. This is the time of year to stay inside and travel within the world of a good
It’s Friday night. I just finished DJing the anniversary party for the Young Professionals of Augusta. As I’m winding up the power cords for my lights, my phone rings. It’s my mother-in-law who is babysitting or kids. “Kris, I hate to bother you but No. 4 is crying hysterically and saying that