Are you one who lets people know when they have pepper in their teeth? What about toilet paper stuck to a shoe?
I always do. If you leave lunch with me and have still have spinach stuck in your teeth, it’s only because I didn’t see it.
It’s funny how people are so embarrassed when told about food in their teeth, a zipper down or, probably the worst, a booger in their nose.
It’s also funny that, as soon as you start messing with your nose, everyone to whom you are talking will assume it’s a “you have a booger” signal. Heads hang and hands discretely start wiping and picking around, hoping there isn’t a dangler up there.
The other day, I was at a place (I’m being generic to protect the innocent) and I hear a couple of ladies talking. I looked over to see one of them fawning over the other’s shoes. They were, uh, remarkable. I’d say they had at least 5-inch heels. You know, the kind that keep you standing on your tippy toes all day. They were gold and flashy.
“I don’t know how you walk around in those all day,” one said to the other.
I agreed but kept to myself.
Their conversation continued, even adding another woman. She complimented the dress. The lady with the tall shoes was dressed nicely for the location, and it was clear she spent time on her hair and makeup. She was proud of her appearance, but not in any sort of jerky way. As they spoke, each woman lifted the other up. It was kinda sweet.
I didn’t turn around again until it was time to leave. Seeing the ladies smile at one another, enjoying the compliments, was refreshing and it made me smile. Women being nice to women, instead of judging.
Here’s where it gets tricky.
Disclaimer: in the following description, I am not questioning Tall Shoes Lady’s ability to choose clothing. I truly think she was unaware and possibly needed someone to point out the little shortcoming. Maybe not.
In addition to her tall shoes, Tall Shoes Lady was wearing a dress. It wasn’t crocheted or knitted, necessarily, but it wasn’t as thick as canvas or cotton duck, either. It didn’t have visible holes, and it wasn’t completely opaque.
I could see her underwear, y’all. As in, it was darkish bright blue. We aren’t just talking panty lines here. It was a thong. I was behind her the entire walk to my car, and I couldn’t help but notice.
If you can’t guess, I wanted to ask if she meant to. If she did, more power to her. I wouldn’t want my underwear to show through my dress, but maybe it was part of her look.
If she didn’t know, should I have told her? Should I have likened it to a piece of spinach plastered on her front tooth? More appropriately, is it like having her dress tucked up in her pantyhose? I could almost see as much of her bits.
Did the people paying her such grand compliments not notice? Or were they compensating for visible panties? I was embarrassed for her and have thought about it since. I’d like to assume it was intentional. If it was intentional, I don’t feel so bad not letting her know I could see her brightish dark blue panties through her cute little dress. Besides, what would she have done if I told her and it wasn’t intentional?
I’ll just have to keep wondering. I’ll file it away with questions like, “Can that mom hear her kid saying ‘mom mom mom’ repeatedly?” and “is that person’s blinker broken?”